Apr 132015
 

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Here as the truth of who you are

When we are willing to be here, just as we are, we are free.

You may say, but here as I am, I am fearful, I am angry, I am lost, I am hurt, I am heart broken. Admitting the truth that is here now, in this moment, is the first step in realising what else is here, what is deeper, what is closer. When we are willing to speak the truth about what is here, instead of covering, avoiding, placating, trying to fix, then there is an opening that becomes available, a deeper crack into what is being revealed.

There is nothing wrong with an emotion that arises. The mind, society, conditioning may say otherwise, yet if you are wiling to be here with whatever is here, without making it wrong, without trying to change it, without trying to fix it, without moving away in any of your habitual strategies, then there is the opportunity to experience what is untouched by any of it.

Over Easter I read this profoundly, simple and true quote from the beloved teacher Gangaji

“Under the anger, under the fear, under the despair, under the broken heartedness, there is a radiance that has never been harmed, that has never been lost, that is the truth of who one is.

No matter your life circumstances, no matter what is here now, there is a radiance that has never been harmed, that has never been lost. This is the truth – here, in the willingness to be with whatever is, under it all, under whatever is arising, here, is this that you are, here, silent, untouched, aware and free. Shining awareness, Radiance itself !

My beloved teacher Papaji says there is nothing other than here! No past, no future, not even any present, only here!

Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here! Here, now, where we are, in the silence and freedom of the Self, as Shining awareness, as Radiance itself ! Here as the truth of who you are!

In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji

Apr 062015
 

( excerpt from: Profound Awakening – Meeting Papaji Now – Vol 1 – Yantra-ji)

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The choice to be Free – Fulfillment of your deepest longing :

Essentially there is no difference at all between you and me – There is only the giving of your self fully, to the choice to be free. ~ Yantra-ji
You have to decide right now to be free once and for all. Everyone who has found freedom in this lifetime has had to make this decision. ~ Papaji

You like me, have had a deep longing, a desire to be free, a desire to know yourself, a sense that there was essentially something more, something that was being missed, overlooked. Maybe you meditate or come to Satsang – something has you come to Satsang. You have all had a taste, a glimpse, of your essential self, otherwise you couldn’t be reading this, you couldn’t have this longing.
What do you really want at the deepest level, deeper than anything else?
When we investigate this question we see that on the surface there are many desires and wants, survival wants and superficial wants and desires. First there are the desires of survival, the desire to be housed, fed, have something to drink, a safe space to live – if you live in a war zone you want to be safe! But in the west and here in this country, we are safe. We are housed, we are fed.
So we look then, what are the next desires?
To be loved, to be liked, to be respected, to be happy. There comes a point where you see that even when those desires are fulfilled, you are not fulfilled. To have things, material things, even when those desires are fulfilled, you are not fulfilled. To have relationships and even when those desires are fulfilled, there is still something left unfulfilled. There is this calling, a calling of you to investigate, what is true. And so that then is the choice, to follow the call of your own heart, to follow the call of This that is living you, not born of the mind, not born of thought, not born of identity, not born of social norms, but the call of This that is deeper, This that you are.
Have you had a deep longing, a desire to be free, a desire to know yourself?
Do you have a sense that there was essentially something more, something that was being missed, overlooked?
Do you meditate or attend Satsang?
Have you had a taste, a glimpse, of your essential self?
When you have had a taste of This, an experience of the truth of your own self, is there now nothing else that you want MORE than This?
Are you still searching, or is This that you experience yourself as, enough?
Are you willing to give your attention to this opening, to This, at the same time as life is occurring?
Is there a choiceless choice to surrender, to give everything to This, to the moment, to what is true?
Are you unwavering in your commitment to be still, to be silent, to honour and live from what is here, what is real?

So you have the call, the opportunity to make the choice to be true, to be free, to not move, to stay still, silent as you are – then you experience yourself as this that is deeper, unchanging, unmoving, silent, free, awareness, always here, always present – life continues, as it does – and you are free.
The willingness to be still, to inquire, opens the opportunity for you to experience the truth of who you are, that you are both nothing and everything. That this whole life of needing to do and gain and get and be, is nothing – AND – at the same time, a beautiful, wonderful, play of creation, of sharing, of experiences.

So this question:
What do you want at the core, at the deepest level, beyond all of the superficial desires? What do you really want? This is the essential question!
It is one thing to say that you want freedom!
Is it true that you want freedom, whilst wanting your identity, whilst wanting to be safe, whilst wanting to be in control, whist wanting to be loved?
In Satsang, it is speaking the truth to yourself, about what is here, about what you want and then giving yourself to it. The willingness to stay still, the willingness to allow life to move you, rather than you constantly moving in life, against life, away from life, rushing towards life. Satsang is this incredible opportunity in this lifetime to stop, to rest as you are and then you discover, that Satsang isn’t the person or the room, or the teacher or the teaching. Satsang is you, Satsang is consciousness, Satsang is this that is living your life every moment, no matter who you are, no matter where you are.
Satsang is this offering of your own self, the choice to be free and to stay true to that.

My beloved teacher Papaji says :
“You have two choices: Either you follow most teachers and spend your life trying to remove or clean out the mind. First you will have to find out if the mind exists. No one has seen the mind. Even if you found it, how do you propose to clean it? Everyone is practicing cleaning the mind but there is no one so far who has cleaned it. Where is this mind to be cleaned?
The second choice is to keep quiet and you will know who really you are. This is very simple. It is not going to take you time; in fact time does not appear. There is nothing outside that can help you, you have just to keep quiet – that’s all – and you will know then you are eternal. You are Eternal Existence itself.” ~ Papaji

Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here in the silence and freedom of the Self.
In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji

Mar 232015
 

 

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Distraction can be a deeper call to Being Present

Once you have started on a path of health, healing or self inquiry, it is easier to see the more blatant habits of distraction, both in others and in yourself. There are three main movements of avoidance -  moving away, moving towards and moving against. These movements get mixed in with behaviours and habits of distraction, which are always to avoid some type of deeper feelings or sensations, such as fear, terror, isolation, loneliness, unlovabiity, unworthiness, weakness, being a fraud, a failure, vulnerability, or feeling out of control.

These distracting behaviours were initially in place to help keep you feeling safe, secure, protected, loved or in control.  However once the surface is scratched, we see that these behavious don’t actually work, that the habit of distraction is just that and these feelings are still beneath the surface waiting to be revealed, seen and felt.

The distracting behavious may show up as avoiding, numbing out, over doing, being unavailable and as addictions. Almost anything can be used to distract and to avoid – drugs, alcohol, over eating, TV watching, video games, social media, sexual addiction, physical activities, shopping, cleaning, being a workaholic – the list can go on and on.

When we have a desire to be true, to be free, it becomes both clear and uncomfortable to continue to indulge in these habits. The desire to be true, to be here, to be present, requires the willingness to feel whatever is here, whatever has been hidden, whatever is surfacing, whatever has been unconscious or obscured from view.

What may not be so clearly seen, are the more subtle habits and tendencies of egoic distraction and movements of mind. It takes a deep commitment to be true, and vigilance to see how these blatant tendencies can often be substituted for another behaviour of distraction, that may look more spiritual on the surface.

In being ruthlessly honest with yourself – where are you substituting one avoidance strategy for another? Have you stopped eating junk food only to become obsessed with healthy eating, have you stopped being inactive only to become obsessed with physical activity, have you swapped being a workaholic for constant distraction and procrastination on social media, or through entertainment, have you swapped endless doing, for endless chanting, yoga or spiritual practice – take a look and see what is playing out in your life. No matter what it is – there is a deeper call to be true, a deeper call to be real, a deeper call to feel, a deeper call to be present. The awareness of any distraction can then be used as a deeper call to Being Present.

In being present, what do you notice? What becomes available? Deeper than all of the strategies of avoidance, deeper than the unmet sensations and emotions, what is revealed, what is here, untouched, silent, free, aware? – There is the possibility of using your own presence of awareness to turn in on itself  to reveal presence itself.

Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here in presence, in the silence and freedom of the Self.
In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji

Mar 162015
 

 

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The simple choice to ‘Stop’

Let us first explore this simple little word ‘Stop’.
As we were growing up we heard the word ‘stop’ so many times, that it may have a negative context.
Stop misbehaving, stop moving, stop making a noise, stop, stop, stop – it is understandable that we may not have a healthy relationship or response to this word. Each time we heard the word stop, it may have involved a sternness, anger, even a physical response like hitting or slapping. This ‘stop’ was often in order to get us to comply with someone else’s code of behaviour – our parents, our family, our school, or some other institution.

‘Stop’ may be associated with being bad, wrong or in trouble and the punishment that was to follow, being some form of physical punishment or deprivation.
‘Stop’ may also have been used as a warning signal, to freeze, to become immobile in the face of danger, causing one to withdraw, become rigid, or hold the breath.

In all of these examples hearing the word ‘stop’ could also be causing us to rebel.
‘Stop’ is not generally a word that would have been associated with pleasure, satisfaction, freedom, peace or joy.

As we can see, this one little word ‘stop’, this innocent word, may not necessarily be experienced by most of us in a healthy way. So at first, it can be useful to uncover what we have associated with this word. 

What is it that you have associated with the word stop?

When we no longer attach all of the negative meanings to the word stop, then it can be of real value, of real use, here now.

What does it mean to ‘stop’ in the context of Satsang, in the context of freedom?

My beloved teacher Papaji, says to Stop – to stop all searching, to stop all movement and following of mind – then we experience the truth – that we are already free.

To stop means to be still, to not move. to not move towards a single thought, to no longer follow the story line, to be here present as you are. To stop is a call directly to the truth that is here, beneath all of the movement of mind, of form, of fixation, of gender. To stop calls us to be true, to be here, to be now. To stop means no longer following the habitual movements towards, away or against, in order to get, to have, to be, or to do.

When I hear the word ‘stop’, it calls me to account, to attention, to be still, it pulls me deeper into the silence that is always here. The word stop for me, is the immediate call to silence. Stop is the instant call of now. The willingness to meet all of life, here now, fully, as it is.

Gangaji says – “When Papaji said “Stop”, he was not saying stop your feeling or stop your situation. He was saying stop the identity that is fighting this situation or feeling. It does not mean feelings stop, it does not mean situations stop, it does not mean reactions stop, but the stopping is the willingness to see “I am fighting this, I am dramatizing this, I am avoiding this, ah, I can stop, I can actually open.”
Without all of the negative past conditioning, what is here now, when you hear the word ‘Stop’?

Allow the word stop to vibrate through your being. Allow the word stop to be your call to be true.

To ‘stop’ means the willingness to be here, now, still, silent, aware,  to stay as you are - free, here, now.

Satsang is the opportunity to ‘Stop’, to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here in the silence and freedom of the self.
In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji
Mar 092015
 

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Meeting life as it Is:


I am often asked what does it mean to meet?

To meet an emotion?

To meet each other?

To meet life?

To meet and be met means, to be willing to be open, to be vulnerable, to be present, to be naturally and authentically yourself. Usually there is someone showing up with an agenda, a need, a fear, some internal story line. There is often a fear that we wont cope with the events of life, with the intensity of life, that we will be consumed or overpowered. All of this arises in mind. When all of that is left untouched even for a moment, no movement, not towards, not away and not against, then there is the possibility of true meeting, here now.

This meeting is free and fresh. This meeting is unexpected. This meeting is unknown.

My beloved teacher Papaji, says to Stop – to stop all searching, to stop all movement and following of mind – then we experience the truth – that we are already free.

When we are willing to be here, just as we are and allow life to be just as it is, we are meeting life and life is meeting us. There is no agenda, no one needing something, nothing to be fixed or changed, no expectation – all of life, is just as it is. There is an openness, a spaciousness and an acceptance of what is. There is no longer any need to control, outcomes or life.

Life shows up as it is. To meet life means to meet it all, the willingness to experience it all – and – to stay as you are .You may still experience the whole spectrum of emotions and sensations that pass through this form and yet you no longer take it personally, there is just a moving though that is allowed. Actually there is no one really allowing anything – it is the absence of resistance, that appears as if something is being allowed.

Emotions and sensations may be experienced as wonderful or painful, this no longer matters, all of it moves through. Life will still show up as life, with amazing, wonderful events that may unfold, or tragic and painful ones – In the willingness to experience it all, to meet it all, then peace is here, regardless of whatever is arising – and – you are free.

The mind and thoughts will still arise. The willingness to leave the thoughts untouched, un-followed, leaves you free, as you already are, to meet life here – as you are!

Meeting Life as it Is, means the willingness to experience it all – and – to stay as you are - free, here, now.  Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here in the silence and freedom of the self.

In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji
Mar 022015
 

 

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Remaining deeply rooted in Silence, whist being active in the world.

At first glance this statement may seem contradictory, or that the two parts of this statement are opposing.
Let us investigate and inquire into what is true.

What does it mean to be deeply rooted in silence, whilst being active in the world?
Who is it, what is it, that remains rooted in silence?
Where is this silence to be rooted in?

For a moment, if we are willing to turn our attention away from the activities of the world, away from the doing, away from the activity of mind, we become still.

Does that mean, that we then need to be still, physically, emotionally, mentally, to rest in and as this silence?

At first it may be useful to stop all activity for a moment to inquire. To cease the endless movements of doing, being, getting. To cease following the thoughts and story. To cease the engagement with any emotional response and to cease the engagement with any sensory response of the body.

What is discovered when you are still?

As we allow ourselves to be, in and as this stillness, we find it to be silence. A silence that has always been here.
What is required for this stillness, for this silence?

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We notice that the body is here, the thoughts are arising, emotions are arising and sensations are occurring, they arise and fall of their own accord, out of and back into the silence. If we don’t actively follow or engage with these movements, we experience that  the silence permeates all.

We then can observe that the body activities, still occur in this silence. The breathing, eating, sleeping, getting up, walking, talking. So we can see and experience these activities also arise from and return back to the silence, with no engagement and without a “someone” needing to do anything. From this it is discovered that all activities are arising and falling from this same stillness, this same silence.

When we explore the truth of this, we can discover that the body may be still or in motion, that the emotions may be rising or falling, or the thought stream may be occurring. All occurring out of this stillness, from this silence. Nothing then is needed to be stopped, to be still, in order for this silence that is always here.

When we are willing to give our full attention here, to what is already still, to what is already silent, then we are no longer troubled by the appearance of whatever is rising and falling. Outward activities occur. We are fully present, at peace, rooted in the silence of self, no longer engaged with the arising and falling of any phenomena – AND – able to be active in the world in a natural, authentic way. No one needing to do anything, not directed by body, thought or emotion, rather activity is directed by life itself – and this form, with all of its amazing qualities, is used then in service, to this life.

Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here in the silence and freedom of the self. 

In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji IMG_7386-Version-3-150x150-1 copy

 

Feb 232015
 

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Here we meet in the silence of the self


Satsang – here we meet in the silence of the self.

Life – here we meet in the silence of the self.

In this moment, here, there is no past, no future.

It is easy to touch the story of something, to justify, to blame – but what if you don’t – what is here if you don’t touch it?

What would you have to feel, have to meet, have to experience?

What has the story been covering?

Fear is an arising of the past, projected into the future. Let it move through, making it none of your business – and remain here now.

The fire of anger and rage, when felt, rather than projected or suppressed, without any story or attachment, is the fire of all fires, the fire of life, the fire of truth, the fire of freedom itself.

Even the name of another, attaches to a form, a story, a past projected into the future – remain nameless, formless – here!

Be willing to feel whatever is here, stay open and discover what is true – allow it all. When there is no story, no movement of mind, no emotion or pain is generated – you are free – only silent aware presence remains.

Allow it All – all of the devastating emotions, all of the blissful emotions – what remains is the truth, freedom itself – Here!

Here we meet in the silence of the self.

 

Silence is the Language of God

All else is poor Translation

~ Rumi

Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Let us meet here in the silence and freedom of the self.
In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji
Feb 162015
 

 

Response-AbilityResponsibility


Many people flinch when they hear the word responsibility, as they take it to mean something negative, relate it to blame, or being burdened. During our childhoods and into our adulthood, there has often been a weight associated with responsibility. An imposed belief that we need to, must, ought to, or should, be responsible! Responsible, in order to shoulder the burden, or take ownership of a perceived wrong – hence the relationship with the feeling of blame. If i take responsibility then i am at fault i am wrong, I am being judged.

Being responsible then often swings the other way into a righteousness, being better than, being holy, pure, saint like. This is just the opposite spectrum of the same weight, the same burden, the same imposed beliefs – if I don’t take responsibility, if i am not responsible then i will still be wrong, bad, etc.


When we really investigate this word responsibility, we uncover something else  something fresh, something light, something wonderful actually.


Responsibility is simply the Ability to Respond!
Not to blame, not to justify, not to accept wrongdoing, not to be the one at fault.
Simply the ability to respond.


The ability to respond rather than react. The ability to have a healthy response, to be true, to remain in the moment, free as you are and respond to whatever is here, freely freshly as it arises. No sence of justification, blame or false accountability.


When we are still, silent, aware, we open to what is here before any preconceived ideas or concepts, before any thought. In this still, silent, awareness, we find our own self. Here as we are, we respond to life as it is, as it occurs, with all its beauty splendor, majesty, with all of its heartbreak and pain. We respond not from a closed, premeditated stance, not from a mind directed action, rather from a free, open, innocent place – awareness itself.


How fresh, how freeing, how amazing to be free to be yourself – and this that is you, this that is self, this that is life – responds as itself, to itself.


Ahhh, such a relief to just be here, as you are. Such a relief, to not need to know, do, be, have. Such a relief to respond to the moment freshly.
Responsibility – such a joy.

Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – innocently, freshly, freely. Allow this that you are, Freedom itself, to respond to life.
In all love for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji
Feb 092015
 

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Staying Quiet and Choice

I recently read this beautiful piece by Papaji, where he speaks about what he means by -  staying quiet, what is bondage and ignorance, teachers and spiritual practice – and Choice. There is really nothing more for me to add, so I am sharing the whole quoted piece here for you to read.
Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – as this that is Freedom itself.
In love and gratitude for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji

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“When I speak about quietness – when I tell you to keep quiet – it is not easy for everyone to follow. Most people here are from different backgrounds, practices, sadhanas; and therefore feel they need to do something, to put something into practice. When I say, “Keep quiet.” it is not a practice. There is nothing to be done and nothing to be undone. This cannot be followed. There is nothing to think about, no need to make any kind of effort. This is an indication of the quietness I am speaking about. Truth always exists. Existence alone is. It is called satyam.

We speak about enlightenment, but first we have created bondage. Bondage does not exist. How can you remove that which does not exist? First, teachers impose a concept of bondage and then various practices are prescribed. There may be millions of books in the world, thousands more are published every day. Nowhere does it say, “Be quiet”. When you simply say “Keep quiet,” what is the rest of the book to be about?

There is no ignorance at all; there is only existence – there is only satyam. If you simply keep quiet you will know that only this exists. Before the sun rises early in the morning it does not first try to remove the darkness of the night. The sun does not say, “Let me brush away the darkness and only then, in the daytime, I will rise.” For the sun there is no light, there is no darkness to be removed. The sun does not even know that such a thing as night exists. What practice is needed to remove darkness, where is this darkness? All practices imply the reality of darkness, of ignorance, when in fact they do not exist. The river in the sand is a mirage; it does not exist, it never existed. If you go closer and closer the sand not even is wet; it is only a belief that makes us run after a mirage, nothing else. There is only satyam; there is only Truth. What need is there of practice? It is only practice which is concealing the truth.

You have been given a concept by most of the teachers that there is darkness, and that you have to spend your whole life clearing this darkness. No one speaks about light; everyone is trying to remove darkness and ignorance when it does not really exist.

First of all, look for yourself! Has anyone seen any ignorance? Sometimes when people who come to see me come closer to keeping quiet they say, “I do not understand.” What is there to understand? Simply keep quiet – this is what you really are. How can there be any doubt? In keeping quiet you discover what you really are.

Through spiritual practices you overlook the one who is causing this to happen. Who is involving your limbs in the practice, your intellect in the practice? Who is causing your mind to be involved in trying to get understanding? If the one causing activity is not there you cannot conduct any practice. This is why I tell you to simply keep quiet. Then you will know what you truly are and what you have always been, and this is indestructible. All else will be destroyed, only Existence itself remains. The Truth will always remain – it Is – it is eternal. That which is not this truth does not exist at all.

You have two choices: Either you follow most teachers and spend your life trying to remove or clean out the mind. First you will have to find out if the mind exists. No one has seen the mind. Even if you found it, how do you propose to clean it? Everyone is practicing cleaning the mind but there is no one so far who has cleaned it. Where is this mind to be cleaned?

The second choice is to keep quiet and you will know who really you are. This is very simple. It is not going to take you time; in fact time does not appear. There is nothing outside that can help you, you have just to keep quiet – that’s all – and you will know then you are eternal. You are Eternal Existence itself. ~ Papaji

Feb 022015
 

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Meeting in Namaste:

When we are driven by egoic desires, spiritual ideals, by thoughts, ideas, concepts of what should or shouldn’t be, we are unavailable to really meet another or to be met by another.

When we are moving towards, in an effort to be someone, get something, be loved, we are unavailable. When we are moving against, trying to dominate, assert, control, we are unavailable. When we are moving away, staying safe, avoiding, we are unavailable.

When we meet another in this way, what and who is meeting?

It is the ego meeting the ego, the desires meeting desires, the expectations meeting expectations.

To be caught up in our stories of right and wrong, of how to be or not be, is a painful, complicated and taxing way to live and relate. This is not meeting or being met, this is not who we are.

To stay still as we are, here in the moment, with no agenda, with no movement, no desire – a different possibility appears, a different opportunity opens up.

The willingness to be still, to be open, tender, vulnerable, available, unknowing, unmoving, allows the possibility of being met and meeting another truthfully. Meeting with a quiet mind and an open heart.

To meet another in this way, there is space, there is innocence, there is actually nothing at all, just presence itself meeting presence, openness meeting openness. How beautiful, fresh, to meet in this way.

There is the possibility to meet anyone, everyone, in this way – to meet in the silence of the self,  meeting in Namaste.

Namaste
I honour
And
I bow
To the divinity
In me
That is the divinity
I see
In you
One self
One heart
One love
Namaste
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( Namaste – from ‘The Gift of This – Poetry and Prose of Satsang with Yantra-ji’ )
Satsang is the opportunity to come together as we are, to tell the truth, to meet our self and each other as the one self – as this that is Namaste itself.
In love and gratitude for this that you are
Namaste Yantra-ji