Moved by the Presence of Love
Presence is this that is consciousness, grace, awareness, love itself. We have the opportunity at every moment to be here as we are, as this consciousness, as this grace, as love, as awareness itself. There is nothing that we need to do, to be this! There is nothing that we need to gain, to get, to fix, to change – consciousness, grace, love, awareness, presence is ALWAYS here as who we are. It is only the minds attention that moves to other things, born of thoughts driven usually by fear and survival.
To stay here as we are is refreshing, freeing, liberating. Nothing is needed, we are just as we are. We are moved, we are used, freely and freshly in each moment by This that we are. We get to respond, to play in life, just as we are. There is such a gift in just being naturally, authentically ourselves, being This that we already are. There is no concept, no thought, no preconceived idea of how we will be used, how we will be moved, how we will play, how we will respond. Everything is fresh, new, alive, this is the gift of presence, of love itself.
I was recently in the city during the day with my beloved, to attend a meeting. Whilst he works in the city, going into the city is not a regular occurrence for me. We headed first to a nearby parking station. As we turned a corner at a set of traffic lights, there was a man sitting on the corner, on the pavement with his back to me, holding a hand written sign – I could not read all of the words other than – ‘I am homeless please help me’. I was moved by such a strong and overwhelming desire to get out of the car and help him. It was as though I was struck by such a compelling force, it arose not from any thought, only from this unseen grace that pushes and pulls us if we stay open and available to the moment.
My beloved teacher Papaji says to stay still and silent on the Mountain top (referring to Mt Arunachala) don’t move unless you are pulled or pushed by grace.
This was one of those moments, this pull, this push was so strong. I said to my beloved, “oh I need to get out, I need to see him, I must meet with this man.” By the time these words were spoken, we had moved around the corner in the traffic and I was unable to physically get out of the car. There was a deeper trust and an inner knowing arising that I would indeed be meeting with this man.
We traveled up and down the maize of one way streets to get to our parking destination, then started to walk on foot to our meeting.It was like being a child in awe, in wonder at everything, the buildings, the people, the senses being bombarded by movement, sound, smell, by life – it was incredibly fresh and alive.
Then we arrived at the traffic lights opposite the homeless man sitting on the pavement, my heart skipped with joy. I reached into my bag for some notes to give him, folded them discretely and held them in my hand as I waited for the lights to change. I was aware of no one paying him any attention, no one looking, and as we started to walk across towards him I was aware of people averting their eyes from him, moving around him, still paying no attention.
Here was a man, another human being, sitting on the cold cement pavement. Who knows why his life had conspired to have him be here, why his destiny was as it was at that moment. There was no judgement in his condition or circumstances, all I could do was respond to the moment, to move towards him, being led by this internal pull, by this unseen grace, by love itself.
As I went towards and around to the front of him, I could see he was holding the sign in one hand, holding a book in the other reading, there was a can in front to put money, coins in ( there was a 5 cent coin in it ).
Putting money into this can was not what I was being called to, not to placate him, not to appease some sense of a righteous deed, the money did not mean anything, as the small offering would not really make any difference. I sat down on the ground directly in front of him, with people walking all around us. He looked up and met my gaze, I met his, met him. Here in this moment all stood still, there was no me, no him, no other, no homelessness, no people, no city, no street. Here there was just presence. Here there was just love meeting love, meeting itself, being met, not needing anything.
I put my hand out discretely toward him and said – here this is for you. Without averting our eyes from this meeting he tucked it into his top pocket. We continued to be here together, innocently freshly meeting together.
It was indescribably beautiful. Such a precious and rare meeting with such a beautiful human being. What a gift , what a blessing.
How many had missed this opportunity, to be present anywhere, any time, to anyone.
There was no need to speak, no need to ask anything of him, no need to tell him anything of me. Then the words arose – I hope you have a really lovely day today – our eyes still in this same gaze, this same meeting. As I got up, he went back to reading his book, holding his sign, sitting on the pavement – having been truly met. Met by life, met by grace, met by this one self showing up here as the two. The preciousness of this gift for both of us.
My beloved stood silently this whole time just witnessing as aware presence, and shared with me how we have no idea how such a meeting could change the course of someones life.
We left and went on to our scheduled meeting, had lunch and then walked through the city some more. There were other homeless people all around doing whatever they were doing. There was no pull to take action, only just the silent witnessing of This that is life showing up in all of its forms.
Without any judgement, I was aware of witnessing the overt display of wealth that is surrounding us everywhere, and the poverty, not just of the homelessness, but the real poverty of having the attention taken by this and that, distracted by anything and everything that moves us away from our heart, away from love, away from This that we are, presence itself.
I shared this encounter with a friend, who said that she would not be able to do that, could not do that, could not imagine doing that, she said it was too confronting, what about her life, her children, how could she stop and do what I did.
The truth is ‘I’ did not ‘Do’ anything – there was no ‘I’ doing involved - just as Papaji said, only move from the mountain if you are pushed or pulled by grace. All that occurred was an impulse from grace arose, it was followed and enacted by grace, and was a blessing shared by grace.
So a question may arise – Does this then mean that we should or need to stop and support every homeless person we meet?
This cannot be answered by me for you, other than, to say that what is required only, is trusting what is here arising in the moment freshly. Following the pull of grace, this that is love, this that moves your heart, effortlessly – This is what you trust, this that is living you, guiding you, moving you, this is being Moved by the Presence of Love.
In gratitude always for This One Self