Who is this ‘someone’ that is showing up?
What a privilege it is to share with beloveds in Satsang and the fresh discovery of what is true. Last week we had a very strong inquiry through the questions : Who is this ‘someone’ who is showing up? Who is this ‘someone’ who has a life, who is this ‘someone’ who comes to Satsang? Where are you still identified a ‘someone’, as a ‘somebody?
While we may be aware though numerous Satsang inquiries, or though the personal spiritual search, that the ‘someone’, the ‘somebody’, is just a thought arising, we have the opportunity to really investigate the truth of this, not as an idea or as a concept. Through fully investigating who and what is arising, something new fresh is discovered, revealed to be true.
Investigate for yourself now – Who and where this someone, this identity, this one who has a life, is showing up. Notice first what is here – the body, sensations, emotions, breath. Notice all the ways that you identify, all the naming, all the roles, for this that you identify as. As a man, woman, adult, child, sister, brother, lover, friend, wife, husband, partner, daughter, parent, mother, father, sibling, colleague, worker, boss, employer, the good one, the bad one, nice one, kind one etc etc – there are so many ways we name and keep an identity, an idea of ‘our-self’ in place.
Start by bringing your attention to just one of these ways you identify, one of these namings, one of these roles. Notice as you bring you attention to this, how your body feels, any sensations, any tightening, clenching, notice your emotions, any response internally, physically, emotionally, mentally, without telling yourself any story about this naming / role. Notice how and where this someone is showing up, in your body, in your stance, in your energy, in your actions, in your arrogance, in your projections, in your mind, thoughts, concepts.
Now notice what is really here if you could no longer know yourself as that, no longer be know as that, no possibility of that even existing. What do you notice? What is the truth? What is really discovered? Without any possibility of naming of this role – maybe you discover a sense of contraction or strong emotion, fear, anger, shame, terror – allow that, stay open, what is here as you allow this?
What other roles or naming do you have that is keeping this identified self in place, this that you think of as you, this that you think is you?
Again ask – what is really here if you couldn’t know yourself as that, or be known as that, no possibility of that existing at all, not anywhere in consciousness. What is really here? What do you notice? What is the truth? What is really discovered? – Maybe you notice there are no edges, no boundaries, no definition, nothing solid – Often the instinct arises to protect, to contact, to re- identify. As though we were made of clay, we pat ourselves back into shape, back into the defined, back into the safe secure edges of what is familiar, into the known.
Sometimes it is the core of the identity that arises and is revealed, this that is keeping the whole identifying and ego structure in place. Ask again – If the fearful one, rejected one, shamed one, betrayed one, abandoned one, unsafe one, alone one (… etc etc ) had no possibility of existing, if you couldn’t be that one, couldn’t know yourself as that one, couldn’t be known as that one – what is really here? What is discovered, what is the truth that underlies, that remains, that is always here, before, during and after these roles, these names, this identifying? If the unmet core fear is under the naming, identifying, go deeper, who you are remains untouched, open wider, go deeper still.
Notice the effort, the contraction in keeping the role, the naming in place. Notice the effortlessness of yourself when you have no possibility of entertaining the existence of that naming. When we remain open rather than contracting, we discover there is ‘no one’ to protect – we remain as openness itself, as spaciousness itself, as Freedom!!
Remain as this that you are. If naming or identity arises, there is no need to contact, to cling, or to follow. Remain soft, breathing, open – remain as you are, wide open, unknown, boundaryless – Free!
In deepest gratitude for the truth of this One-Self ~ Namaste Yantra-ji